Absolute.

 My internal dialogue was something like this... “I don’t look like THAAAT.” “That’s not me.” Do you see the articulation?   I wasn’t just expressing disapproval.   I didn’t just say, “I don’t like that picture of me.”   I was so embarrassed by the photos, that I was doing everything I could to discredit them .   I was dismissing concrete evidence.   I was denying reality. Caveat 1: If you’re looking at photos of yourself and your thoughts are something like, “I look ugly.” Then, you’re facing a different battle- that’s not about your weight.   Caveat 2: If you’re looking at photos of yourself and the thoughts are things like, “oh, that’s a bad angle,” or “oh, I had an awkward face”- then it’s possible that you’re just not photogenic. But if you’re saying something to convince yourself that the picture is not an accurate representation of you or your health , then please know, you’re not alone.   I’ve been there.   Also, ple...

  “I’m big-boned.” I used to say this.  I don’t know when or where I learned this phrase, but I know I didn’t use it when I was kid.  I never heard a medical professional describe me as big-boned.  But as I became unhappy with my weight and appearance, this phrase became something that I kept repeating. In truth, I’m not big-boned.  Maybe you are.  But that’s not the point. Our skeletal mass accounts for 12-15% of our total body mass.  Being big-boned adds an extra 5 to 10 pounds.  (that's all) Not only that, but think about it...  Being big-boned shows up in an x-ray, not a traditional photo. You can keep describing yourself as big-boned.  You CAN keep pointing to something that you cannot change and use it to console yourself about your health.  OR you can start focusing on the things that you can control - your diet, your lifestyle, your mental & emotional health. I described myself as big-boned more times...

  If you’ve known me for less than 10 years, you might not know- I used to be fat.   Not subjectively “fat”.   Not fat, relative to how I look now.   I was medically obese.   If you looked at the ideal weight range for my height and multiplied that number times 2, that would give you the highest number that I saw on the scale. I was over 200 pounds and I quit using the scale after that.   Maybe you knew me then, maybe you didn’t.   The truth is, I didn’t know myself. I had no clue that I was fat.   I would have admitted that I had weight to lose, but I was oblivious to the reality that I was extremely unhealthy.   I was on the path to countless medical problems and chronic diseases and I didn’t know it. I had brainwashed myself. I believed lies. I used the people around me to normalize my behaviors and dismiss my convictions about my lifestyle. I started correcting my relationship with food about 10 years ago and am still growi...

 A while back, I read “Trust” by Dr. Henry Cloud.  He writes repeatedly about how humans are hardwired to trust.  We are built to trust others and form relationships.  The book covers a lot of ground but one of the over-arching ideas is that when you spend time with someone, the natural by-product of that time is that you begin to trust them. It does not matter much about the person’s actual conduct or character.   It also does not matter much how they treat you.   If you stick with them, you deepen your trust in them.   The books goes in depth about how this plays out in your daily life (it IS a worthwhile read), but I think we should also be very conscious of the inverse side of this equation… The people who are spending time with you, most likely trust you.  Even if there is no conversation with a trust litmus test or any other form of a DTR (Define The Relationship), they probably trust you and more significantly- your opinions.  Our ...

  “Great is the enemy of good.”   I do in principle believe that statement.   I have seen this play out.   I have come up with this elaborate Olympic high dive routine for something in my life and ended up doing a belly flop instead.   It has happened.   The statement has relevance and application and there are many tasks and areas of life where good is good enough. There have also been times when I have intentionally decided to be good, not great.   My last year of teaching was also the last year that three of my kids were going to be home.   I decided that I didn’t want to sacrifice my last year of major influence on my kids’ lives, for my classroom.   I chose to be a good teacher (not a great one). But still, great is the enemy of good, is not a statement I want to build my life around.   There are many parts of my life that I don’t want to just be “good”.   There are areas, tasks, and roles where I want to be “great”. ...

 Two weeks ago, I lost 2 pounds and hit a huge milestone.  These 2 pounds made me the lightest I have ever been in my adult life.  I am 34 years old, and I am the lightest I have ever been, the strongest I have ever been, and the fastest I have ever been. For a lot of reasons, I did not think this weight was even a possibility for me.   Based on my lightest weight in Minnesota, current muscle mass, and some other variables- I thought my weight would plateau at 145 pounds.   I was in disbelief as I approached my previous lightest weight and am still struggling to believe that I have broken that threshold as well.   This is data and numbers but my perception is still incredibly emotionally driven.   It is facts, but still the reality of it is so allusive to me. Before this year of discipline, I would look at women in good physical shape and I would admire them because I knew they were working harder than me to look like that.   I really had NO ...