Absolute.

 My internal dialogue was something like this... “I don’t look like THAAAT.” “That’s not me.” Do you see the articulation?   I wasn’t just expressing disapproval.   I didn’t just say, “I don’t like that picture of me.”   I was so embarrassed by the photos, that I was doing everything I could to discredit them .   I was dismissing concrete evidence.   I was denying reality. Caveat 1: If you’re looking at photos of yourself and your thoughts are something like, “I look ugly.” Then, you’re facing a different battle- that’s not about your weight.   Caveat 2: If you’re looking at photos of yourself and the thoughts are things like, “oh, that’s a bad angle,” or “oh, I had an awkward face”- then it’s possible that you’re just not photogenic. But if you’re saying something to convince yourself that the picture is not an accurate representation of you or your health , then please know, you’re not alone.   I’ve been there.   Also, ple...

  If you’ve known me for less than 10 years, you might not know- I used to be fat.   Not subjectively “fat”.   Not fat, relative to how I look now.   I was medically obese.   If you looked at the ideal weight range for my height and multiplied that number times 2, that would give you the highest number that I saw on the scale. I was over 200 pounds and I quit using the scale after that.   Maybe you knew me then, maybe you didn’t.   The truth is, I didn’t know myself. I had no clue that I was fat.   I would have admitted that I had weight to lose, but I was oblivious to the reality that I was extremely unhealthy.   I was on the path to countless medical problems and chronic diseases and I didn’t know it. I had brainwashed myself. I believed lies. I used the people around me to normalize my behaviors and dismiss my convictions about my lifestyle. I started correcting my relationship with food about 10 years ago and am still growi...

 A while back, I read “Trust” by Dr. Henry Cloud.  He writes repeatedly about how humans are hardwired to trust.  We are built to trust others and form relationships.  The book covers a lot of ground but one of the over-arching ideas is that when you spend time with someone, the natural by-product of that time is that you begin to trust them. It does not matter much about the person’s actual conduct or character.   It also does not matter much how they treat you.   If you stick with them, you deepen your trust in them.   The books goes in depth about how this plays out in your daily life (it IS a worthwhile read), but I think we should also be very conscious of the inverse side of this equation… The people who are spending time with you, most likely trust you.  Even if there is no conversation with a trust litmus test or any other form of a DTR (Define The Relationship), they probably trust you and more significantly- your opinions.  Our ...

  “Great is the enemy of good.”   I do in principle believe that statement.   I have seen this play out.   I have come up with this elaborate Olympic high dive routine for something in my life and ended up doing a belly flop instead.   It has happened.   The statement has relevance and application and there are many tasks and areas of life where good is good enough. There have also been times when I have intentionally decided to be good, not great.   My last year of teaching was also the last year that three of my kids were going to be home.   I decided that I didn’t want to sacrifice my last year of major influence on my kids’ lives, for my classroom.   I chose to be a good teacher (not a great one). But still, great is the enemy of good, is not a statement I want to build my life around.   There are many parts of my life that I don’t want to just be “good”.   There are areas, tasks, and roles where I want to be “great”. ...

We are in a sweet, sweet season with the kids right now.   One of the twins made straight A’s for 5 th six weeks and the other made A-B honor roll for the entire first semester.   All 3 kids have jobs.   All 3 have their licenses. 2 of them have purchased their own cars.   2 of them are in the process of talking to college coaches and hoping to attend college in the fall.   They are coming to the place where they treasure the opportunity for all 5 of us to gather around the dinner table and they value family time.   Both girls are coming to me and Matt with stories and wanting us to be a part of their lives.   They are independently setting their own technology boundaries.   I thought I was going to write a whole blog post about how good they are doing right now, but this blog isn’t supposed to be a highlight reel.   I didn’t write a blog post about all of the hard days that led up to this.   I didn’t write about the drama and tears she...

 So, the word of the year thing is very trendy and I think I have only jumped on this band wagon once or twice in the past.  I’m not very good at it. Made obvious by the fact that I don’t remember any past words of the year with confidence and that I’m not even solidifying my word of the year until February…nuance.   Anyways, I have received and committed to my word of the year- “DISCIPLINE”.   Some of you that know me well might be a little confused by this (as was I).  I am already a pretty disciplined person. Significantly more disciplined than most, and very comfortable with that.  I have not drank a drop of alcohol in 4 years and haven’t consumed any sweets for about 3 and a half years.  I eat well.  I work out multiple times a week. We have 1 TV in the house, and I barely watch it.  I rarely lose track of time swiping on social media.  Discipline permeates pretty much every area of my life. So when God hit me with this discip...

  Yesterday (10/30), we held a ceremony and buried the physical remains of my grandma.   My beloved “Mome”.   The night before, the husband was checking on my emotional state and I told him, “I’m good.   She has already given me so much. It’s enough.”   This came earlier than we expected, but still my grandma has passed so many things down to me, most of which were passed down through my mom.   A few of the most impactful things that I received from her include… ·        Teaching kids about Jesus.   She was passionate about it and good at it.   From Sunday school to VBS to in-home backyard bible camps, she did it all and so have I. ·        Compassion for her neighbors.   Sure, maybe she was a little nosy, but she cared… AND she prayed.   She cared about what was going on in their lives and was always willing to help out however she could. In my lifetime, I saw her serve as...

Through different seasons of my life I increase my understanding of and appreciation for different components of God.   When I didn’t have a consistent father figure in my life, I needed God as a father to the fatherless ( Psalm 68:5 ).   In middle school and high school my pastor constantly reminded me that God is perfect ( 2 Samuel 22:31 ) and so being made in his likeness I strove for excellence in EVERYTHING I did.   Then in college I learned to rest in the sufficiency of Christ, that no achievement of mine could ever make me worthy of the sacrifice God already made for my salvation ( Philippians 3:3-9 ).   The God of wisdom ( Proverbs 2:6 ), the God of forgiveness and mercy ( Ephesians 2:4-6 ), the God of compassion ( Psalm 145:9 ), there are many qualities and characteristics that contribute to the composition of who God is.   During this season of my life, my heart is focused on God’s faithfulness .   The word faithful is an adjective with many...