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Transformation Tuesday


Many of you know I celebrated my birthday two weeks ago, but those who know me really well know I celebrate my birthday pretty much all month.  It started when I was young; my parents were divorced, so it took a while to make it around to mom, dad, both sets of grandparents, step-family, etc.  Old habits die hard.  During this time of celebration, I always take inventory of my life over the last year (goals, hopes, accomplishments, etc.).  Normal people do this on New Year’s, but my annual calendar has always revolved around my birthday and Christmas (Thanks Mom!).  I have written a few blog posts about the outward transformation that has taken place in my life over the last twelve months, but this Transformation Tuesday blog post is about the inward transformations that God has worked in my heart over the last year. 

There are no incredible ‘before’ and ‘after’ pictures that illustrate the change.  Only my closest circle of friends and family know about even half of the things me and God have been up to, but this is EXCITING!  Even more exciting than 63 pounds and I definitely want the people in my life to know that my God is living and ACTIVELY transforming my life!  So, this year- I’m sharing a little bit of the inventory.  Since my last birthday:

I have developed a better understanding of the connection between Pride, Humility, and Wisdom.  I struggled with this before because there are so many meanings for both Pride and Humility.  I would use the different definitions and the “good pride” to justify all of the pride in my life.  Now, I’m learning that my pride battles God for the throne in my life.  My pride manifests itself into a desire to be omniscient and omnipotent, but those are reserved for God.  I’m practicing humility before God and humility with others and that is producing wisdom in my life at new levels.  Yes- I noted the irony of ‘boasting’ about humility.

God has given me an increased burden for the lost.  This has prompted me to be intentional and invest in others in new ways such as attending social functions I would normally skip out on, giving gifts to people because I want to be marked by generosity, taking advantage of more opportunities for conversation, etc.  I hope that at this time next year, I will say the same thing again, even more so.

My Prayer Binder
I started a prayer binder (a little over a year ago) and I highly recommend it to anyone who feels like their prayer life is lacking.  My prayer binder has helped me to align my motives with God’s purposes in the battles that I face.  It has helped me to be increasingly strategic and intentional in my prayer life.  It has taken my prayer life from a shot gun blast of prayer requests to time where I am seeking God’s will and inviting him to work in areas of my life I was trying to handle on my own.  The binder has also become a great tool for tracking the growth, development, and transformation of my heart.

My extensive study of Proverbs taught me more about the value of wisdom and that God wants in on EVERY part of my life.  Proverbs addresses money, work, marriage, parenting, sex, and more.  God does not endorse compartmentalizing and nothing is off limits to him.

God has used my aging dog, my elderly neighbor, and the book of Ecclesiastes to give me a new outlook on life as a whole.  I have also seen how small things can make a BIG difference in someone else’s day.  I’m struggling to articulate what’s changed about my outlook on life as a whole and I think that is because I’m still figuring it out myself.  I heard a quote that sort of sums up the gist of it, “Only one life is passed, and only what’s done for Christ will last.” Dr. Jack Graham

Me, Cali (teen on loan), and Hoss (aging dog)
Having a teenager on loan for seven months has opened my eyes to how much my personal spiritual walk directly affects that of those around me.  I have to be consistently spending time in scripture, in prayer, and taking in the love of Christ in order to be able to give love to others.  I have to be intentional about filling my cup with living water.  If I’m walking around with an empty cup, I limit myself in what I can do for others. 

I have done a lot of fasting over the course of the last year.  Not just specific foods in conjunction with Whole30, I have also fasted meals, fasted things in my prayer life (as in NOT praying about specific things), and fasted the scale periodically this year.  In each of these fasts, God has called attention to areas of my life that were broken and unhealthy.  But God doesn’t just leave us in a state of brokenness, fasting also provided ideas for a different approach and guidelines to bring these areas to a healthier state.

Submission is something I’ve always struggled with in my marriage <shocker, I know>.  Over the last year God has revealed how my criticism of my husband (especially in the day to day small things that really do not matter that much to begin with) sabotages my efforts to be more submissive.  My criticism of him also opens the door for others to criticize him.  How I talk to my husband and about my husband, models to others what is acceptable and appropriate; further sabotaging submission, because they’re on ‘my side’.  The part about modeling to others what is acceptable and appropriate is true in lots of relationships- friendships, parent/child, etc., but I’ve seen it most clearly in my marriage and the kids we have around us.
The 5
God has taken my burden for “The 5” and grown it into a passion to make an impact on generational poverty.  This has been both humbling and overwhelming as God is calling me to do big things for his glory in this area.

I am very fortunate to have been raised by a mom and step-dad who are extremely selfless and service-oriented.  They have always modeled a heart of service and sacrificing for others, so these types of actions are normal to me.  I am working to change my own mentality from “this is just the way we do things” to “we do things this way, because of what Christ did/does for us”.  I am working on shifting my own mentality so that I can in turn do a better job of pointing back to Christ and giving God the glory.

That’s how God has been working on my heart.  I was surprised when I started writing by how long the list became.  It is a healthy practice to look back from time to time, just to remind ourselves of how far we’ve come.  If you want to hear more about any of these specific things, feel free to ask.  What has God been doing in your life lately?  What areas are you working on?  I would love to hear what God has shown you recently! 

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